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Be careful what you wish for
I have been experiencing more than a little ennui of late. Feeling like the end of a job, rather than effectively the beginning. Not really applying myself, and taking a somewhat cavalier attitude to the work. And, let's be honest, being more than a little smug - I've rejected all criticism of my methods, on the basis that I'm achieving plan, so people can, quite frankly, take a hike. But, all in all, it has been a little dull. So, the fates delivered quite the opportunity this week, when Finance informed me that the plan I have been diligently working to all year, is actually wrong. Wrong by a factor of about 20%. In every Board meeting I've been paining a rosy picture of steady as she goes, when in reality there's a chasm opening up beneath me. The evil genius of it is, that had I known things were on the slide I would have created an elaborate tale of excuses and mitigators. Excuses which now, will have little credibility. I am quite screwed, but I cannot help but be amused by it - it's true karmic reckoning
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Eurovision 2007
All in all, a fine Eurovision. Won, surprisingly enough, by a good song, well sung. Albeit by one of the most robustly butch performers to bestride the stage; and I suspect containing a hidden subtext about the annexation of Kosovo. Serbia led a number of former eastern block states who delivered strong entries - FYR (FYI get over yourselves) Macedonia; and Georgia were very underrated. The endearingly barking Ukraine. Russia's 'St Trinians girls go emo'. Points deducted though, for Bulgaria shamelessly ripping off the bassline from What Time is Love. And yet again we are a nation shamed; with the execrable Scooch. An act conceived by charlatans, and selected by morons. Achieving the seemingly unfeasible feat of beating Daz Sampson to the accolade of our worst Eurovision entry ever. And those carping about the partisan voting might want to reflect on the fact that the UK was only saved from a richly deserved nul points by Ireland and Malta. The "everyone hates us we don't care" line is wearing a bit thin these days. We're not getting points because we're serving up irredeemable crap. Although I reckon the only way for the UK to secure a top 10 placing is with Mr Bean singing War What is it Good For.
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On being good
It has not been a bad Bank Holiday weekend I drank Bovril, ate pies and watched minor league football. I may never return to the Premiership. I painted the room which will become my office. Which brings me, barring flooring and cabling, a great step closer to having an orderly workspace. I pumped myself, vigorously, in the gym. A considerable improvement on the phoned-in sessions I've been doing of late. I slept, an adequate amount. Which was wonderful. I resolved the hitherto intractable plot difficulties which have been dogging my opening 10 pages. Simple pleasures, but pleasures none the less.
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Mostly, I have been watching
The ABN Amro takeover battle The tail end of 06 saw Barclays being eyed up by BBVA and Bank of America. The writing was clearly on the wall for Chief Exec John Varley - merge or die. Which is where the motivation for the £45bn bid for ABN Amro comes from. A successful tie-up would creates the world's 5th biggest bank. An £85bn company, which should be big enough to survive. The deal was to be funded by Barclays shares, and was contingent on Amro offloading their subsidiary LaSalle to Bank of America for $20bn. And things were looking good last month, with Rijkman Groenink, Amro's Chief Exec opening the books, and putting out the welcome mat. Until, RBS/Santander/Fortis crashed the party with a counter offer. A deal presumably driven by Fred Goodwin of RBS, who needs to protect their UK position against competition from a substantially enlarged Barclays. Going head to head with any one of the 3 is no small undertaking, they're serious players. But the trio working together creates big problems for Barclays. And for Amro. The RBS/Santander/Fortis offer is 70% cash, and higher than the Barclays bid. And getting more attractive by the day, as Barclays shares begin to slip. But, it's dependent on LaSalle being part of the package. ABN Amro shareholders made their position very clear at the AGM. They want the cash, and RBS. To this end, they've successfully halted the sale of LaSalle to Bank of America. But, Bank of America have a contract, so they're going to sue Amro if the sale doesn't go ahead. And, Barclays are going to sue Amro if the merger doesn't go through. Some people like sports, for me, it's the theatre of big corporate deals. This one's the best for a long time. We've had far too many insipid arranged marriages lately. The stakes are just so much higher here. If Barclays fail, they're dead meat; Bank of America will turn on them. Groenink is probably done for whichever way it goes, no-one gets between shareholders and their money. RBS will likely win the day. And, for about 20,000 staff, it's going to be an unhappy Christmas this year....
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just business
encountered a strange feeling today - the warm glow of effort, well rewarded. Could this be what they call 'job satisfaction', it's all very curious.... My pitch went well. It was, uncharacteristically, low on spin, and heavy on pith. There were facts, evidence, and even some measure of truth. Every once in a while, just for the novelty if nothing else, a reasoned argument is not a bad approach. Particularly when you're telling people what they really don't want to hear. And I win. After six months of deeply irrational, and purely emotional objections, I get what I want: progress, with minimal risk, and a substantial fall-back position. Now a victory like this doesn't come without cost, of course. Every silver lining has it's cloud. Into each life, a little rain must fall. Not my life, obviously, other people's........ Specifically, one of my colleagues, who is going to experience the rather unpleasant prospect of giving me 25% of his turnover, but keeping all of his annual target. To be fair he took the news surprisingly well - there just so gosh darn nice here.
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You can't handle the truth
It has, been a tiring day. Barring the couple of hours I spent at lunch, and a hour in the bar, I've been nose to the grindstone from 9, right through until past 6. An uncommon, and unwelcome level of effort. The reason for my pain? My boss's breezy "let's move the meeting forward. It's no problem is it? You said you'd already done the paper" Well, the paper has somewhat of a duality. It very much exists, in the mind of my boss, because I've said I've done it - and that existence has a reality. Yet it doesn't have a tangible reality, at this time. It quite clearly has potential for existence, even though that existence cannot be established in the now. But, since I'm guessing he's not big on Schrödinger, I go with a "yeah, no problem" So that was me this morning, a blank sheet of paper, and a pit of despair. The problem with the paper goes far beyond mere idleness. It's an existential malaise. It requires me to propose 'doing' something, when nothing is required. When the status quo will easily deliver us plan, to go in there and improve things. And to take a business risk to do it ((shudders)).
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